I am a super freaking lucky girl. I just had the great fortune of honeymooning in South Africa and Zambia (celebrating my marriage to Jason, a truly incredible and special man). As if the magnitude of this celebration and the grand adventure of our first visit to Africa was not enough, we traveled with TUT Wow Tours (check it out - tut.com - you won't be sorry!), a travel family of absolutely amazing like-minded individuals. And, for those of you familiar with TUT already, among these amazing travel companions were Mike Dooley, a.k.a, The Universe, and his brother Andy Dooley. Mike and Andy are both authors, public speakers, teachers,and coaches specializing in the power of our thoughts to change our lives. 'Thoughts become things, Dude' ~ Mike Dooley. I have recently become certified to teach the TUT Infinite Possibilties course. As I return home from this most magical and life changing trip, I have been reflecting on how life will proceed from here. Being so far away from 'life as usual', and seeing such different cultures and landscapes, gave me a fresh perspective and context necessary to more clearly see the magic of how the Infinite Possibilities core principles and lessons apply universally. Thoughts Become Things. I know, I know - we are incredibly complex beings, and there is just no way that this overly simplified statement can be true, right? I started this course with the same skeptic mind. I mean, I am a scientist. We need interventions, randomized trials, and committees (at the very least!) to make 'things' happen, right? But, the more I loosen my mental grip to allow for alternative explanations and routes for how to get where I want to go, I realized that this concept is right on. There is of course nuance and much more to discuss on this, but in the end, it truly is simple - 'Thoughts Become Things.' While in Zambia visiting Livingstone and Victoria Falls, we had the great fortune of visiting the local 700 year old traditional Mukuni Village, and interact with a small portion of its 7,000 current residents. This was the most primitive village I personally have ever been to, and it was a truly humbling experience. Did they just not know that thoughts become things??!? Along the village tour, we were invited into one family's living space - a small round hut with walls made from terminate mounds and a thatched roof. A couple of thin pads to sleep on where the only thing close to furniture. There was no electricity and no water. But, on the wall was one hand-written piece of paper, a portion of which is pictured above. In the lower right hand corner, I was absolutely floored to find this quote, 'Everything's better when you feel better'. In the end, what things do we all universally want? I would venture a guess that whether you are thinking of specific material things, grand experiences, or loads of cash, the over arching theme is happiness. Feeling better. And when you focus on happiness - when you choose happiness* - you attract happiness, and everything is better. You have the power right inside you - your Thoughts Become Things. Taking Action - start with baby steps. To create change, be it big or small, you need to take action. But, here is the amazing news - no matter how massive the change you want to make, the action necessary to get there invariably consists of super small (sometimes seeming almost useless and futile) baby steps. Baby steps like just getting off the couch, walking out the door of your hut, phoning a friend, putting your clothes on to greet the day, smiling at a stranger.... you get the idea. A step in ANY direction will be a step in the right direction in that you are allowing for possibilities every time you do so - possibilities even beyond anything you can imagine or plan for. Cape Town, South Africa, was one of the most profound demonstrations of the 'haves vs. the have-nots' that I personally have ever seen. There is an entire culture - consisting of tens of thousands of people - that reside in the Cape Town shacks (community pictured above). These communities often exist directly across the street from mansions and wealth beyond my imagination. At first glance, it was hard for me to think about how the Universe and concepts of Infinite Possibilities were actually at play here. With my limited Western beliefs, I was tempted to feel nothing but heartache for these residents. How can the Universe let them live like this? But, what is abundance and what is happiness? These constructs are actually incredibly personal. And again, the baby steps necessary to get there are invariably small regardless. There is no wellfare system in South Africa, so what was most fascinating and eye-opening to me was that those looking to take action are extremely creative in their baby steps. They were taking action and creating their own change and abundance. Hand written notes offering a variety of skilled services in the wealthier resident mailboxes. Standing on busy street corners with the tools they need to complete electrical work, yard services, and home repairs. And my personal favorite - those who would collect trash from vehicles at stop lights in exchange for a modest tip. Talk about service mixed with a super creative baby step! They are OUT THERE. Taking action. And, by doing so, they open themselves up for infinite possibility. Who knows who may pull up in the next car? That small step to help a local passenger literally clear their vehicular clutter may just change their own life in massive and magical ways. Everyone can succeed and be abundant - no matter who, no matter what. Now, I can hear what you are thinking, as I have heard it so many time before. "Must be nice to take a first class trip to South Africa!" And, yes - it is nice! It has taken me a while to admit what abundance means for me, because it always seemed really self-indulgent and almost shameful. But, we all create our own realities and ideals for abundance. So, I am putting it out there! My focus is on a first class life. Connection, travel, adventure, learning and teaching. First class for me means finding adventure every day - here at home, and in traveling around the world. It means riding business class in the plane, and staying in a luxury hut with running water on safari as opposed to camping in tents. And I am very fortunate and grateful to be realizing this abundant life. Truly grateful. But I put it out there every day, and I make sure to take the action steps. Very often I have no idea where those baby steps are going to take me. I also frequently find myself way off track and frustrated to have to take a u-turn. But as I look at my first 40 years of life and where they have brought me... I can't deny that it is happening! And as I look at the wide variety of people that we encountered our our African adventure, there was success and varied flavors of abundance all around. Everywhere there was evidence of personalized abundance, action steps, and success. Now, as a scientist, I obviously can't statistically prove that anyone was actually achieving their self-defined abundance and success, but as a spiritual person, I could feel it - it was obvious in their happiness and joy. Shaun was our safari ranger at Ngala Game Reserve, and casual conversations with him over the course of our game drives revealed that he is enjoying a pretty awesome and abundant life. Contrary to what I find limits us most in our Western world - his abundance is all supported by what many would consider a modest if not meager salary. But he is out there. Taking baby steps and taking advantage of currencies beyond the almighty dollar. Born and raised in South Africa, an opportunity to teach English as a second language brought Shaun to Thailand. In Thailand he was able to become a scuba instructor. He then became a safari ranger and currently teaches tourists all of the magic and wonders of the South African bush. His work with his current employer will likely bring him next to anotherdream location where he can once again teach scuba diving. He is traveling the world. He is learning unique skills. He is teaching. He is adventuring. Whether he was aware of it or not, Shaun reinforced a need to free ourselves from past self-limiting beliefs of what abundance is. While this lifestyle is not necessarily everyone's dream, I was absolutely blown away by his sense of adventure and absolute freedom to follow his life in whatever direction unexpected abundance took him. In full disclosure, I didn't ask him about fears of self-limiting beliefs along the way, or what his parents may have had to say every time he decided to up and move to a different country. But he just keeps showing up, with his sights set on his version of abundance, and it is working - opportunities are coming, and the Universe is showing up for him in a big way. I mean - the stories above alone were evidence of magic and the power of the Universe so far as I was concerned. But again, being out of context and out of the hypnosis of my daily routine, I was able to be more aware. The magic was EVERYWHERE. Being able to look right into the eyes of a zebra walking freely on the path beside me in Zambia. Hearing hippos 'laughing' during an open air massage on the Zambezi River (at least Jason and I thought it sounded like they were laughing...). Watching a lion family walk so majestically past our safari jeep at night. Seeing a whole new sky on the other side of the world. Speaking with locals - who live a life so different from ours - and finding common ground...realizing our sameness. Connecting with a group of likeminded people from all over the world in such a spectacular setting.
This is just the tip of the iceberg. Truly! Want to learn more about the power of your thoughts and helpful tools to harness your your absolute potential for Inifinite Possibility? Registration for my online course, Abundance, Adventure & Infinite Possibility, will go live this fall. This course will involve 6 one hour live webinars, recorded for your convenience and later viewing, and discussion through access to a private Facebook Group. Click here to join my mailing list for updates on session dates and registration information. *A note: I want to be be clear and acknowledge that I certainly realize there are situations in which simply 'choosing happiness' is way easier said than done...we will talk a lot more about that at a later time, I promise! Stay tuned for more in the near future.I mean - the stories....
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This must be the question of the year. Seriously - I feel like I am hearing this everywhere I turn - is it just me? As it turns out, I think it is more the case that the Universe has been talking to me for quite a while now, but I haven't been hearing it correctly. It has recently occurred to me that this seemingly innocent phrase has been following me everywhere I go for years, and may be a root cause of some of my darkest self-limiting beliefs.
I was a smart girl in High School - even on the new science and technology path that was rather non-traditional in my all-girl Catholic school. And I was a 'good girl' -- aim high. Straight to the Ivy League I went - I was ALL IN. In fact, it turns out that Cornell was the only college that I even applied to, I was so ALL IN. (well, ok, fine. While true, it was only because I had applied early decision, and acceptances were mailed before the traditional cycle applications for the other schools were due. So - not so much 'ALL IN' as 'IN LUCK' on that one. But, you know what I mean.) When I started graduate school: "This is a doctoral program. You will be the one person who knows the very most about your research topic when you are done. To be successful on this path you must be ALL IN." (No pressure there.) When I was in the middle of writing my doctoral dissertation, and preparing for my defense (I was in the tunnel, but the light was still barely visible), I sat in a committee meeting one unforgettable Friday afternoon, just a few days after having moved to a new house. Despite barely being able to find my toothbrush among the maze of boxes before heading out, let alone arranging childcare for my young daughter, my committee chair demanded, "You are going to have to let those boxes sit. Realize your priorities, and get ALL IN. Otherwise, you are not going to make it." While I guiltily did unpack some boxes, I was for the most part absolutely ALL IN, and I did in fact receive my PhD that year. I had made it! Of course, only to find out that, now I had the honor of beginning my Academic career and it was time to secure funding and write publications. I needed to establish a track record of success, and quickly. I needed to be ALL IN. But, like I said, I was a 'Good Girl' - and smart good girls are committed, right? And I was competitive - super competitive. (OK - that something I am still working on, I will admit.) So, if ALL IN was where it was at, then I was going to be there. I was certain that it would all be worth it in 'the end' if I could just muscle through and stay committed. We will 'get There' someday...where exactly was 'There'? Hell if I know. Happiness, I guess? Ultimate fulfillment? It was never clear, and I was too busy being ALL IN to stop and ask. 'Just finish grad school.' Then, 'Just wait until your daughter is in school'. Then, 'Just get the first grant'. And then...I remember talking with my mentor one afternoon, after I had just secured a big grant that I spent 2 years being ALL IN on. I mean, this was a major feat - I had to have arrived, right? Not yet. "We can't stop now - we need to start thinking about what's next. It is time to be ALL IN." I was on a super shiny tall ladder that just kept getting taller as I climbed. But I was ALL IN, and I was strong. So, I kept climbing. Until I finally realized that my shiny ladder was leaning against the wrong damn wall. Even when I left Academics and began yoga teacher training, I went to one surprisingly grueling training (a totally separate story), where ALL IN showed up again. (How the heck did it find me in yoga of all places?!) And then again, when I switched gears to yet another industry entirely, I was digging it, digging it, digging it...and then that phrase popped up...it was the catch phrase for the entire freaking year in fact - 'Are you All IN?' But, ALL IN for what? For a better future 'someday'? What about today? And, ALL IN for someone else's systems and beliefs? What about me? My logical self is a 'rule follower' - if my peers, teachers, mentor, company - suggest I need to be ALL IN to succeed, then than is what I should do. My fear was judgement, and with this I was limiting myself. Doesn't not being ALL IN make me flighty? Flaky? Ditzy and non-committed? Unreliable? Now, I fully accept responsibility for the fact that, in my former black and white reality, the option other than ALL IN was ALL OUT, but I am guessing I am not alone with this one. Luckily, my authentic self is a rebel. And this is what I have come to appreciate so deeply lately. I AM ALL IN. I am ALL IN FOR ME! Wanna be ALL IN for you? Here is what I have finally realized, and maybe this will work for you as well. We all have a limited bank of time + energy + money. Do you maximize your budget to be ALL IN for your authentic self? What if we considered all the opportunities before us to be a big buffet, and we can totally take the bits and pieces that best serve us, making us most whole - and drop the rest? Two steps are really all it takes - awareness, and release. Awareness. Are there things in your life that are no longer serving you that can be dropped – perhaps they are parts of someone else's ALL IN? Academics was definitely someone else's ALL IN. And, despite the culture of strength and empowerment, which was such a necessary part of my journey... it turns out that I have recently decided that Mary Kay, too, was part of someone else's ALL IN. Which left me feeling confused and guilty. I mean, seriously - leaving BOTH academics, AND Mary Kay both in 2017? (Bring on the waves of self-judgement and fear again.) But, when I took some time recently to look at this in a different light, the picture became clearer. Once I allowed myself to be ALL IN for me, I realized that every experience in my life brought me to exactly where I am today - I am still a scientist, and I have definitely been empowered. I see the beauty in myself and those around me more clearly and regularly. I have been able to absorb, learn from, and integrate exactly the bits and pieces from every experience that I needed. Release. Did you find the parts that are no longer serving you? Small portions or whole situations; one person or an entire group...whatever it may be. Got it? Take a deep breathe, and let these things go. Maybe even just give it a one week or one-month trial run. Be present to how these changes affect your overall happiness, bring back whatever you miss and need back in your life. Moreover, be OK with the process of constant change, evolution and discovery along this journey. You are ALL IN for you, and you are exactly where you need to be. Since I have already gotten one 'I Don't Get It' on my mission with the Clarity Project, I want to share more about what Clarity means to me. But before I do, I need to say that it was my own mother who ‘didn't get it’; through no fault of hers, my own self-limiting beliefs sent me right into a death spiral of my old thought patterns;
“Who are you to share on clarity when you can't be clear yourself?” “It is a stupid idea, and no one is going to get it." "Everyone is going to think you are crazy." ...and on, and on, and on… So, let me be crystal clear on one thing (and this is for me as much as any reader) - I certainly don't have any universal answer on what Clarity is or how to achieve it. I share and draw from my 40 years of experience on this Earth to say that I am pretty darn sure that it can truly be a moving and evolving target, you are definitely allowed to switch direction on this fabulous life adventure, and there are in fact a couple of tricks and tools that have helped brighten the light of Clarity along the way in my own life. And, when I do find even the briefest moment of this elusive Clarity? It is glorious - and I know I want much, much more. So what does it feel like? We all create our own reality, and therefore experience absolutely everything through our own filter or lens, created by our past experiences and beliefs (much more on this super fascinating topic later! ;). So, surely, Clarity feels, looks, and in fact IS different for everyone. But I want to take a stab at articulating what I see and feel when I experience this. My sincere wish and purpose in doing so - in creating this post as well as the entire Clarity Project - is that my words and stories find their way to anyone with whom they perhaps resonate, to help heal, strengthen, and empower these people to realize their beauty, strength, and unlimited potential for abundance, happiness and wellness. I love the feeling of warm sunshine on my skin, so, for me, Clarity feels like a bright sun-shiny light. Whereas I have, at some points in my life, spent days under a seemingly heavy cloud of anxiety, depression, doubt and fear, Clarity feel so light. Like I am literally lighter in both body and mind. Clarity feels like someone turns a light on when I have been stumbling in the dark, or that I am finally getting the punchline of a joke. There is ease, calm, and less worry - and in that space, I have room for dreaming, creativity, and the powerful positive thoughts that I want to cultivate. Without the time spent on worry, it is as if the day is longer and the Universe has expanded time. Interestingly, I started this post back on July 4th - Independence Day here in the US - because Clarity feels like FREEDOM to me. When I am coming from a place of calm and Clarity, I can realize without doubt and fear that I am in fact free to make my own choices and to create the life that I want to live. I am clear that my thoughts have power, and that with this power I have an awesome responsibility and opportunity to create an abundant life beyond even my wildest dreams. Clarity is in the moments when I feel happiest, most awake, most alive, and most free to be authentically myself. So, what the hell does this have to do with the businesses that I have initiated under the umbrella of this Clarity Project: yoga, skincare, cosmetics and essential oils? These are simply key tools that have quite literally found me and provided illumination as I stumbled around in the dark trying to find the next step in my path. Yoga got me started, and my personal yoga practice on and off the mat continue to provide the foundational principles with which I approach my life and my businesses. Once I was in the amazing positive, empowered, collaborative and supportive environments of both Mary Kay and doTERRA, I was moved to be part of these companies as if by a force outside myself. The products provide Clarity. Mary Kay skincare products and doTERRA essential oils help me foster self-love. We all need to be a little selfish - in the best way possible - to find our own Clarity. It is the same concept as putting on your favorite outfit, your most sexy pair of shoes, or getting a great new hairstyle. Our true beauty is always there - it comes from the inside. The more that we can take care of ourselves and see our own beauty, and go about our day with beautiful scents all around us, the more empowered and clear we can be. The sharing and marketing process provides Clarity. Before I went to a Mary Kay skincare class - as a customer - I had a mismatched and confusing skincare regimen that I had little confidence was doing a damn thing for my skin. I rarely wore makeup at all, largely because I didn't feel like I knew how to do it 'the right way'. Not only did I learn how to apply not one shade of eyeshadow, but blend three together (Project Runway, here I come!), but I recognized that my yoga had followed me off the mat once again to remind me - in the form of a lovely and kind Mary Kay consultant - that it doesn't matter! As in so very many situations in life, there is no one right way...do what makes you feel strong and beautiful. The exactly same principles hold true for doTERRA - did you even know that there was an essential oil called Melissa? I surely didn't, but the fact that these oils are shared in classes more often than sold off retail shelves gives me confidence and Clarity that I will be able to take full advantage of the myriad uses for these fabulous scents. These business opportunities provide Clarity. As I mentioned in my previous post, both Mary Kay and doTERRA are network marketing companies. What this means is that these companies rely on teams - or networks - of individual contractors to educate and distribute their products. Like building a pipeline for water as opposed to hiking back and forth 5 miles uphill to the well yourself. Talk about Clarity and turning a light on. Before someone took the time to explain these opportunities to me, I had absolutely no idea that there were other truly viable options for me to find abundance and financial freedom outside of using my PhD in an academic or private research setting. Talk about Clarity. Talk about freedom. Certainly, these businesses truly are work, and they are not at all pyramid or get rich quick schemes. There is such an exciting and varied array of similar network marketing options, and I would encourage you to explore - ask me, or ask anyone else you know who is involved in a similar company. I would love to share. The possibilities for financial freedom and abundance of time, energy and money are truly unlimited. I spent most of my adult life and career in the traditional academic system - went to an Ivy League college, followed my fiancé to Medical School and straight into an academic medicine career, and then...of course...had to prove my worth with my own set of graduate degrees. I received a Masters in Public Health in 2004 & PhD in Epidemiology in 2008, and began a very successful career (with a great startup package...every new grad's dream!) in Cancer Research. My research was published with prestigious co-authors, and I even managed to snag TWO highly coveted NIH grant awards.
But, I was miserable. I found I had no passion for the work, and could not help but feel like my soul was being sucked right out of me. Which of course led to some serious self-loathing and self-judgement - 'who can't muster up passion for Cancer research?!?'. I ended up having what I later realized was actually my 3rd major depressive episode (the first 2, unfortunately, going completely undiagnosed) and finally got help when I literally couldn't put clothes on to go to work one morning. During a 6 month disability leave, I found yoga to be a HUGE part of my recovery. I fell in love with everything about the practice, and I learned so much about myself. I started to find some space by quieting the incessant chatter and self-judgement and 'shoulds' in my mind, and in the process got a tiny fleeting glimpse of my authentic self (she is in there somewhere!). I found brief, but magical, moments of Clarity. I will save the next post for what Clarity actually feels like and means to me, but for the sake of time, I will just say that it was peaceful and glorious, and I needed to figure out how to get more of it. So, I got trained and certified to teach yoga. I felt better. The cloud of depression and heavy weight of anxiety started to dissipate and ease up a little. I was healed! So, of course, my ego led me straight into the trap of thinking, 'well, now that that is over, I should go back to the much more prestigious and rational job that I spent so much money training for. I mean, that is the most responsible thing to do.' So, I went back part-time...and then eventually full-time. I had even set aside the yoga teaching for just a little stint. And, what do you know? I ended up right back in the same place, under a dark cloud of depression and spinning frantically with anxiety. But thank goodness the Universe is persistent with me - at the end of August 2016, two serendipitous things happened. 1) The yoga studio that I was teaching at started to sell water bottles that said, 'Love what you love.' And you were to fill in the blanks with a sharpie. But there were only three lines. How the heck do you sum up all that you love in three lines?!? I took this way more seriously than has been intended, but it finally came to me and has been crystal clear ever since... my loves, my passion, my fuel for waking up in the morning: connection, adventure, and teaching/learning (teaching and learning are two inseparable sides of the same coin in this model for me). Well. Mind blown. When I saw my academic career through that lens, I realized that, despite the fact that I was very interested in wellness, my full-time cancer research job was completely out of alignment with what I love. But what was the alternative? 2) Literally within about 4 weeks of the 'water bottle soul-searching exercise', I ended up quite accidentally at a Mary Kay event. Yes - Mary Kay...she was a real woman, it is a real company, no it is not a pyramid scheme, and YES, it is still around and relevant. Truly! I brought my daughter (16 years old) with me - thinking it would be just fun girl time. Not only did I leave there feel completely empowered by the fact that I felt my eyeshadow (which I didn't dare attempt before that day) looked pretty smoking hot, but I noticed that my eyes themselves were beautiful. And, I saw that I did have a nice shape to my lips, particularly when highlighted with that new lipgloss that I would have never tried before that session. Beyond the surprising power of the actual products, the Mary Kay consultant at the event that day seemed to truly like each other and worked together as a team, even though they were all independent business owners, and thus technically in direct competition. This was my very first introduction to network marketing, and the HINT that I actually could become an entrepreneur....and best of all, I realized that the academic world was not the only way to empower people and help them achieve wellness - in all dimensions. SO, I signed up. DOVE RIGHT IN. That was August 2016, and I left academics entirely on February 15th, just shy of 6 months later. When looking back at the two events that launched me to where I sit right this very moment, I realize that a bigger project has been brewing, and I just wasn't sure where in the process I was at with it.... when I first went on leave and started teaching yoga, I was at the time married to a Neurologist. A cautious Neurologist. So, when I started offering classes in rented space, he wisely encouraged me to form an LLC for my (very) small business. The Clarity Project was born way back then, but then was quickly abandoned. I went back to academics, where I could 'use my degree' and earn a steady paycheck. But, after another 'the Universe made me do it' moment more recently, my long time love of essential oils, and extremely serendipitous chain of events led me to doTERRA, and an essential oils network marketing business, and the most fabulous network of spiritually guided and authentic business owners. This series of events, the people I have met along the way, the opportunities that I have been given, and the challenges that I have accepted have all been completed beyond anything I could have ever imagined. And, I realized that THIS is the Clarity Project. A PROJECT because it is DAILY process and evolution. The Clarity Project LLC website is an umbrella launching pad for all the tools that have been critical in my journey - Discovering strength through yoga, Realizing Beauty with Mary Kay, Essential Wellness with doTERRA, and finding true abundance - of time, money and energy - with the unique combination of all three. This Living out Loud Journal that you are reading right now is a companion to the Clarity Project website. It is Clarity in Real Time, and is meant to largely help me record my daily meandering through anything else that may prove helpful (or not so helpful). While specific twists and turns will differ for sure - as we are all unique - I know I can't possibly be alone on this meandering and sometimes confusing path to find clarity and purpose. My intention in sharing is to speak the voice that I have so recently (finally!) found and go public with what I have been practicing (some days WAY more successfully than others) since my first leave absence. I am committed to leading a life on purpose and cultivate a daily habit of realizing beauty, strength, focus, growth, abundance & wellness. Because we are all unique, and despite all of the research and advice, we are all on our own journey to clarity. As this Project evolves for me, the tools I will use and share will likely shift and change as well - I am excited to see the evolution, and I would love to have any company along the way. |
Author: Jenn PetersonHey there! I am a proud mom, wife, scientist, yogi, and teacher. My goal is to help others as I learn to help myself. Together let's help each other continuously realize our absolute beauty, strength, power, abundance & wellness! :) Archives
August 2017
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